Bah Humbug! Dyann Love Barr started her novel, A Perfect Bride For Christmas, with this famous line. I'm stealing it from her.

Let it be said that Christmas is my favorite holiday, seconded only by Halloween. I don't care so much about the gifts, those are serious pains in the rear ends to plan. But give me the decorations, the smells, the hot cocoa... the baking...

This is the one time of year I can convince myself it's okay to make any kind of sweet treat, candy, cookie or cake without hesitation. And believe you me, I will, if given the opportunity. A few of my favorites are Toasted Hazelnut Chocolate Cheescake, the tried and true Chex mix, Fudge, and Tollhouse Cookies.

This year, I have a friend over in Iraq, and I thought I'd send a care package full of homey Christmas-type treats. I have my lists made out. I'm waiting on a gift I ordered otherwise I'd have already shipped it.

First on the list -- Peanut Brittle. I've never made Peanut Brittle before. The recipe looked simple enough. My heroine in All I Want For Christmas... Is Big Blue Eyes made it look simple too.

After trying it, I say: Bah Humbug!!

It turned out edible. But it is not what I would send to a former chef. Mutter. The issues began when, after searching Hen House, I couldn't find raw peanuts and went with plain dry roasted ones. They burn, FYI.

And this recipe didn't specify no margarine, but real butter. (By now, you'd think I would know this in relation to baking.)

The result: An edible concoction with a slightly burned flavor that just doesn't taste "right".

Today I searched a second store for raw peanuts. Wal-Mart evidently doesn't have them either. Tomorrow I will phone the remaining grocery stores in my area.

Where do you find raw peanuts, people??

And for those of you who are adept at peanut brittle, are there any tips you'd like to pass along before I write this one off as one of Amanda Masterson's fictional expertises not meant to be reproduced in real life?


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3 Responses so far.

  1. Yum! All this talk of food is making me hungry. Hot cocoa with marshmellows, peanut brittle, cheesecake, fudge. Oh, I'm gaining weight just thinking about it.

    I have two super-easy recipes for peanut brittle.

    1) Get on phone, call mom, say "I'm hungry for peanut brittle," wait one to two days, then open the door for you mother (duh) to carry in the yum-yums.

    2) Go to store, cruise Christmas aisle, find the brittle, pay, drive home (optional ingredient), open box, begin eating!!

  2. Laugh! Linda, you crack me up. I must confess though... if I weren't trying to send a 'touch of home' across the ocean, I'd be right there behind you in the grocery isle!

  3. Your quote? Below the blog title? Where it toks about the skirts? I never, ever knew. Though, I can hardly believe IT would excite men to sexual frenzy. C'mon. I believe that to be a moldy, left-wing-glitch thot-up by NPR passed along by George Sorrows --- However, that's neither here nor o'thar. Hear ye! O hear ye!! You a writer? Groovy. Here’s our (God/i) nine, insane blogz YOU may steal/plagiarize to thy heart's content, to give you thots and ideas you may have never thunk!! Be prepared, though, Upstairs in Heaven Above, my blogz of humble wisdom and avant-garde-efficaciousness will be attributed to moi, aussi in some kinda trilogy. I don't think you'll much care in the Great Beyond, though, fulla party-hardy, kick-some-assness. God bless.

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"Victorians used the term 'limbs' as a euphenism for legs, which were thought to be so sexually exciting to a man, even a glimpse of a table leg could incite him to sexual frenzy. Table skirts were invented to prevent any unnatural unions between men and furniture."
(History Channel International)



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